Kenyan Blog meme

Developed by Mama JunkYard

Favourite Kenyan food

• Samosa (the proper spicy pili pili ones, not the half hearted tourist ones)

Favourite Kenyan drink

• Cocopine (The coconut and pineapple concoction. Yes it is available elsewhere but it just doesn’t taste the same.)
• Picana (Mango) (Discovered this one recently, no need to give money to the Coca Cola Corporation ever again.)

Due to the conspiracy against me I refuse to give KBL any props.

Favourite Kenyan TV programme

• 9 o’clock News during election time also known as Comedy Hour
• That magician guy, Kini macho (sp?). The way he would mess up and the cover up was too much!

Top 3 Kenyan hang outs

• ADV (the infamous Adventures pub, NGUMMO WHAT)
• The one and only world renowned Florida Two Thousand
• That new joint behind the Kenchic at the Total in Hurlingham. Nice easy pub run by some Quins (I forget the name.)

Top Kenyan holiday destination

• shags (you have no option but to relax in the Ka²mega)

3 Kenyan phrases you use a lot (ati, nini, nani DO NOT count and neither does bilaz!)

• soma label
• chini ya maji
• obvious

Three things about Kenya/Kenyans that make you go ‘hmmm’

• The infamous question, “Where did you go to school?” Why is this so important?
• How you are not allowed to catch strokes in your car at a heng. If you retreat back to the car for a little slap n tickle you are guaranteed to have a watchi bang on your window to ask you what you are doing.
• 10/15 years ago it was uncool to show patriotism. Now days everyone walking in town has the flag on a t-shirt/hat/pin/tie/rugby shirt/socks/glasses/mobile phone covers/ bag/etc. Now if only the government would catch up.

Three things non-Kenyans say about Kenya/Kenyans that make you go ‘hmmm’

• “Kenya. The only country in the world with more animals that people ooooooh”
  (Repeated each and every time I walked into my local barbers run by Nigerians. I go elsewhere now.)

• “You Kenyans, always in a rush. Haraka haraka.”
  (Tanzanians who could understand why we thought it was ridiculous to wait 30mins for chips and two sausages.)

• “You Kenyans are too casual, you never put in any effort. Even your girls.”
  (A bunch of non Kenyan black students who could not understand why we would not dress up in expensive Armani gear to go to a smelly, sweaty, dark and dodgy student disco.)

Three things about Kenya/Kenyans which non-Kenyans ought to know

• We can drink more than you. In fact we can drink more than all of you put together. In fact we can drink more than all of you put together and we will still make it to that 9 o’clock lecture. Kwanza we can drink more than you, make that lecture, and beat you in that exam. This includes the Irish.
• We burn a mountain of ivory every year. If you shoot our animals we are allowed to shoot you.
• Do not stop at traffic lights after 9pm. Yes even if they are red. Just don’t do it.

Complete this sentence: I am Kenyan because…

• of the responsibility and duty I feel to the country and its wanainchi.

And finally - list 3 members of the Kenyan Blog Ring you would like to see complete this quiz

• Delusions of Grandeur
• My Life In Simple Words
• Nehanda Dreams