How to save Kenyan football

Here is the rough draft of the first part of the Mentalacrobatics plan on how to save Kenyan football because Kenyan football needs all the help it can get. If any bigwigs at FIFA are reading this and are interested in seeing this plan implemented I am available for hire for around USD 2 Million. A big shout to the fans at Kenyan Soccer now that is what I call dedication.

Here is the blueprint to save Kenyan football:

Step 1 – Acknowledge that we are crap

We have to accept that as Kenyans we are crap at football. To be honest we have to go deeper than that. We have to accept that we suck at football. This is vital. If we do not accept this we will never move forward.

For too long we have been masters at deluding ourselves. Every Kenyan football fan has a story about, “someone they knew in school” or “a jamaa in the esto” who was or had the potential to be a world class footballer, “if only the system had helped that guy out” we lament, “he would be running things huko Liverpool or Arsenal”.

The thing is this. Every football fan in every country in the world has a story like this. Everybody knows a childhood friend who could have been better than Pele. But guess what, they are not better than Pele. Most are not even close. We can not blame mismanagement and the system for all the problems Kenyan football faces. Countries that are at war, civil war, facing famine, drought, and hurricanes routinely make it to the World Cup, Kenyan can hardly make it to the African Cup of Nations. Even in the East and Central African Championship, a tournament we should dominate if political and economic stability was the key, we still suck.

Once we accept we suck we are empowered to start dealing with the problem at the root.

Step 2 – Restructure the top tier of Kenyan football, the Premier league.

Kenya is a nation of football fans. We are a nation of armchair pundits and experts. We watch and listen to any football on TV or radio and not just the big European leagues but any football. Last Christmas I remember people huddled around radios listening to the commentary from the final of the East and Central African Championship being played between Rwanda and Ethiopia at Stade Amahoro in Kigali. (A tournament Kenya was disqualified from for failure to pay fees to CECAFA.) Kenyans watch and listen to all football. But ask about the Kenyan premier league and you get blank stares most of the time. Not because they are not interested but because the league is a shambles.

As a fan of the mighty AFC Leopards I should be gloating at the problems our bitter traditional rivals Gor Mahia are going through. Gor Mahia, secondly only to the mighty AFC in the history of Kenyan football, can not even field a team and are about to be thrown out of the league. How ridiculous is that. We need to restructure the whole Kenyan Premier league and this is how:

a.) Learn from the European football leagues by disconnecting the national governing body KFF from the Premier League. Separate the two organisations. KFF should be in charge of the big picture and national administration that is football from the grass roots, schools to the national team. A separate body should be in charge of the Premier League.

b.) This separate body should be a registered company. That means it will have to publish public accounts and will be open to independent scrutiny. We have to be able to follow the money.

c.) Learn from the American Football, the NFL (yes I am serious). The NFL is one of the most profitable, well supported, well run sports organisations in the world. The foundation of this success is a golden rule which is understood by all the teams in the league: On the pitch they are competitors, off the pitch they are business partners.
Apply this rule to Kenya. There is no point, AFC, Gor, Tusker or any other team running off to negotiate independent shirt and kit sponsorship. If you were in charge of sponsorship at a big organisation which proposal would you look at seriously, to be the shirt sponsor of one team in the league or alternatively to be the shirt sponsor of all the teams in the league? There would be the same number of replica kits for each and every team available to fans at selected sports shops each of the same make and quality. This partnership between teams would extend to everything off pitch, training facilities, gyms, health insurance etc. our teams do not have the muscle to negotiate separately.

d.) Reintroduce regionalism. At independence the government ruled that tribal organisations should be banned. This extended to sports teams as well as political organisations. While I am not advocating for the return of tribe based teams I do think we need regional franchises. A maximum of three teams per city. So maybe three in Nairobi, three in Mombasa and one in every other town that wants one to a maximum of 15 teams. Each region will have a team. Those teams will benefit from an automatic fan base (remember all those armchair pundits I mentioned above? They would give an arm to have a proper local team to support).

e.) Remove the politicians and wannabe politicians from football. Easier said than done and this goes against the trend in the rest of Africa. Usually in Africa the more the political elite are involved in football, the more successful the team. (I read an good blog post on this recently but can not find the link. if you know about it please let me know.) In Kenyan sports the opposite is true. Cricket, rugby and athletics do not interest the political elite and they are thriving. Football is used as a stepping stone to a political career in Kenya and someone how we have to get that to stop.

Next part will feature grass root initiatives and the national team