Haha

Looking around me I have decided that I do not have enough cool stuff. I have some really cool stuff but not enough. As we are told to be proactive I have drawn up a list of things I should acquire. I can then reflect on this list next year and see how well I have done! Hehe!

Things I do not really need but should have by now and therefore need to get:

• A harmonica
• A pair of binoculars
• A hammock
• A “Kiss the chef” apron - Thanks C!
• A yo-yo
• A Rubik’s Cube
• A baseball bat, a baseball, and two mitts
• A chainsaw
• An official Swiss army knife

That will do for now. Although I suspect this list will grow and grow.

What kind of world are we living in when people are taken to court for sunbathing nude in their own back gardens? Someone should sue her neighbour for videotaping her naked and wasting police time.

Meanwhile in Scotland a woman was banned from answering her front door in her underwear. Under the interim order she could be jailed for six months if she is seen in her garden, at her window or at her front door “wearing only her undergarments”.

For crying out loud if it is my flipping door, I will answer it how I flipping want, wearing what I flipping want! Argh!

666 6666, not the number_of_the_beast but the world’s most expensive phone number. Price: 1.5 million pounds. Some people just do not know what to do with their petrodollars do they! Imagine you pay all that money for that number and when your people try to call on a Friday afternoon they get, “mteja hapatikani …” I’d go mad.

Despite me openly and loudly predicting an Arsenal victory in this year’s Champions’ League final against Barcelona, many upset goooners feel ati I was being patronising ati condescending. That’s the problem with these teams that rarely reach finals, their supporters do not know who how to behave. They are so used to being good losers; they forget how to be good winners! Anyway in another attempt to calm the nerves of Arsenal fans I have searched the great google cache in the sky for signs of divine intervention that Arsenal will win. I have a good track record when it comes to this. Last year I gave you signs that Liverpool (WWI5T) would spank AC Milan, now here we go with The Arsenal.

Sign 1

Arsenal qualified for the European Cup final
Middlesbrough qualified for the UEFA Cup final

There have only been two other occasions when English teams made both finals in European competition. In 1981 and in 1984. In both those years both English teams won their respective trophies. (No prizes for guessing which team from England won the Big One in both those previous finals). OK so Middlesbrough were spanked yesterday but still karma is on your side.

Sign 2

Umm … ok that’s all I’ve got so far (but to be fair you guys did not give me much to work with seeing as you never reached this final before). If you have any other signs please let me know.

The Sopranos

In an episode of The Sopranos, Tony Soprano gave Paulie Walnuts an endorsement he would rather not get after an accident took place on a ride at an Italian festival that Paulie was running using cheap substandard equipment as usual. Possible lawsuits and negative press followed.

Paulie: Hey, T.
Tony: “You’re doing a heckuva job there Brownie!”

[Via Crooks and Liars]

GWB has been keeping busy. Fishing.

BERLIN (Reuters) - U.S. President George W. Bush told a German newspaper his best moment in more than five years in office was catching a big perch in his own lake.
Was he joking? Peter Daou has a look.

Condi and her friends

If Condoleezza Rice suddenly starts calling you her best friend, you better take a number.
[Via Thought Mechanics]

Double standards or not?

Schwarzenegger says the United States needs to “close the borders“. Yes the same guy who immigrated to the United States from Austria as a young man to make his fortune.

I can’t decide which is funnier. The video clip on Mutumia’s or the audio clip on Jay’s Eye View (hat tip Afromusing!). The best of Kenya and the best of Uganda. You decide!

Ever sat there wondering what to blog about?

Click on the picture for the full strip

From the brilliant Boondocks.

DON’T PRESS THE RED BUTTON!

I was looking at previous results for local elections in Manchester, here they are:

CON = Conservatives
LIB = Liberal Democrats
LAB = Labour

Council controlled by
1973-LAB, 1975-LAB, 1976-LAB, 1978-LAB, 1979-LAB, 1980-LAB, 1982-LAB, 1983-LAB, 1984-LAB, 1986-LAB, 1987-LAB, 1988-LAB, 1990-LAB, 1991-LAB, 1992-LAB, 1994-LAB, 1995-LAB, 1996-LAB, 1998-LAB, 1999-LAB, 2000-LAB, 2002-LAB

i guess its to tight to call this time round eh ….

update:guess who won then? surprise surprise