Viewers of today’s feature presentation, The Massacre at Anfield 3, may feel they are watching a repeat of last years feature, which we reviewed on Mentalacrobatics here.

We would like to assure all our viewers that we at Anfield are professionals and thus will never tire of spanking Chelski in the Champions’ League semi-finals.

We would also like to point out to our viewers that it is not our fault Chelski suck. Like many of our viewers we are disgusted that sub standard teams such as Chelski are allowed to participate in such a prestigious competition.

We would like to remind our viewers that winning the Champions’ League requires pedigree, power, passion, panache, pride and a Liverbird on your chest.

YNWA

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Destroy Arsenal in the quarter-final
Demolish Chelsea in the semi-final (again) HAHAH ROTFLMBBAO
HUMILIATE ManUtd in the final

You couldn’t ask for a better end to a season

We’ve won it 5 Times
We’ve won it 5 Times
In Istanbul
We Won it 5 Times

We’ll Win It 6 Times
We’ll Win It 6 Times
In magic Moscow
We’ll Win it 6 Times

It’s only on Loan
It’s only on Loan
In magic Moscow
We’ll Bring It Back Home

Meanwhile …

From: Nairobi, Jomo Kenyatta International Airport, Kenya (NBO)
To: Moscow, Domodedovo Airport, Russia (DME)
To: Nairobi, Jomo Kenyatta International Airport, Kenya (NBO)
Passengers: 1 Adult
Cabin: Economy
Departing: Tuesday, 20 May, 2008
Returning: Thursday, 22 May, 2008
Price: USD 1936.00

WHOA - perhaps I’ll watch it on TV instead.

(Yo Nyiloh, this time it’s on!)

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I was lucky to have the pleasure, for the first time, of watching the final of a major football tournament in one of the countries that was contesting that final. It was not planned, it was a complete fluke as I just happened to be in transit in Cairo between Istanbul and Nairobi. My six hours in transit coincided with the match. I walked around Cairo International Airport looking for a TV screen that was not showing the usual airport advertising pap and for a while I was scared that I would miss the game. How ridiculous that would that have been. Luckily sanity prevailed and most of the screens switched over to Accra as soon business began at the Ohene Djan stadium. Before kick off the airport staff were all polite and diplomatic when I asked, cheekily, if they would support Cameroon. Once the match began it was another story. Shouts, screams, hands in the air, fists shaken at TV screens. Yes indeed, football at its most passionate.

While I was watching the game I was struck again by the immense power of sport. Especially at international level. To put it plainly I sincerely believe that if Kenya had qualified for the Africa Cup of Nations and had done well in the tournament the violence that rocked Kenya would not have been intense as it was. Imagine a commanding Luhya player (the captain naturally) a towering midfield destroyer, passing the ball to Luo player, the creative and flamboyant midfield maestro, passing the ball to a lanky but lethal Kalenjin striker, who blasts in the winning goal cheered by his Kikuyu goalkeeper. The unity the players would have to show on the pitch to be successful would serve as a constant and real reminder of the unity Kenyans would have to show off the pitch to be successful.

This is not just sentimental hogwash. in the run up to the 2006 World Cup with Ivory Coast bleeding from civil war Drogba fell on his knees live on TV and sent out an emotional appeal for the warring factions to lay down their arms. It would be naive to claim that Drogba’s gesture ended the civil war. It would be equally naive to pretend that Drogba’s gesture did not have any effect at all. “All the players hated what was happening to our country and reaching the World Cup was the perfect emotional wave on which to ride.” Togo and Angola qualifying for the same World Cup in German helped heal both nations after decades of civil war. Beyond Africa as well there are numerous examples of the power of sport to unite a nation. Remember how the then new country of Croatia, which gained independence only 7 years earlier, played excellent football to reach the semi finals of the World Cup in France 1998 uniting their country in a sense of pride? Or how much the symbolism North and South Korea marching together at the opening ceremony of the Asian Games (although they did not compete in joint teams) meant to their people?

Sport and especially team sport is a democratic and universal symbol of nationhood which becomes even more important in a country like Kenya where most of the other symbols of nationhood are inaccessible to ordinary citizens.

Two weeks ago a special friend invited me to watch a preseason rugby friendly between the University of Nairobi’s Mean Machine RFC and Mwamba RFC, one of Kenya’s oldest rugby clubs. As with most preseason games the match was a relaxed affair played in a lively spirit. After the game the players from both sides gathered in the centre of the pitch and knelt together in prayer.

This is a regular ritual conducted at the end of many rugby games. This time, however, it was wonderful to see the symbolism of a united Kenya across ethnic, religious, economic, political lines.

Click here for a larger image.

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Football is not just a matter of life and death: it’s much more important than that!
Bill Shankly

It is wonderful to read some different and good news about Iraq for once. This victory and the excitement it has generated is yet another example of the positive role sports can play in uplifting a country. If you do only one thing today then make that one thing reading what the Iraqi bloggers are saying!

Well done Iraq – winners of Asian Cup 2007.

See you in the World Cup 2010! Final: Kenya – v – Iraq!

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The way Gattuso was wandering around after the final whistle like a mad man I wonder what he would have done had they lost again hehe.

Silver linings and all that:
The good thing about nights like last night is that you get to meet real fans. Sitting in Crooked Q making noise long after the final whistle was brilliant. People were walking to us and saying, “Didn’t you guys lose?” Yeah yesterday we lost, but tomorrow we will win, so today we will sing.
(By the way I have final found out the reason CrookedQ exists. Still have no idea what the point of JKs, Tamasha, Sohos etc is.)

Looks like the foundations for a official Nairobi (or indeed Kenya) branch of LFC Supporters club are all here. Watch this space.

Surreal moment of the night was being stopped by police with various Liverpool flags hanging from the car and YNWA blasting from the stereo and then being escorted, flashing lights and all, to Nairobi Safari Club because they decided that we were part of the Burundi delegation in Nairobi for the COMESA summit. HEHE. Yani one look at us and they were like bilaz these nutters can not be Kenyan!

I would post pictures but let me not push my luck.

Walk on, the Rafaloution year 4.

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But heck – who cares?

I TOLD YOU SO!

The Mighty Reds of Anfield lock horns with Meeeeeeeeeelan in Athens in a repeat of the 2005 Champions’ League final.

I’ve said it before and I will say it again, the Champions’ League trophy is the most fussy of mistresses. She only lets a very select few battle for the right to call her their own.

Liverpool and Meeeeeeeeeeeeelan happen to be amongst those few.

Manchester Buccaneers and Spartak Chelski do not happen to be amongst those few.

Chelski: “we’re chasing a historic quadruple.”
Liverpool: “NO you are not.”

What a routine win, it was a walk in the park really, no sweat. Chelski have been crying all season about how they never get awarded penalties, look what happened when they got 5. Useless.

Buccaneers: “We’re gonna win the treble.”
Meeeeeeeeeeeeelan: “NO you are not.”

Hehehe!

As for the Buccaneer fans who had the audacity to come in here and start talking about history and “big clubs”, where do I even start educating you?

Quote of the day

“I guess when you’ve invested £500m it’s a fantastic season to win the League Cup.”

Rick Parry wins the battle of wits against Mourinho

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We won it five times; we won it five timeeeeeeeeees, in Istanbul we won it five times!

It’s only on loan; it’s only on looooooan, in ancient Greece we’ll bring it back home!

Tonight for One Night Only
Showing at a screen near you

The Massacre at Anfield

A Liverpool Football Club Production

Directed by Rafa “The Gaffa” Benitez

Starring

Steve “Captain Fantastic” Gerrard MBE
Luis “Semi Final Goal Scorer” Garcia
Momo “So good they named him twice” Sissoko
Jamie “The Minister of Defence” Carragher
Peter “Crouchigol” Crouch
And The Koppites a.k.a The real Special Ones as the 12th man.

Prediction: Liverpool will beat AC Milan in this year’s Champions’ League Final in a repeat of the greatest game of football ever played.

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GGGGGGGGG Goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool
Crouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuchino!!!!

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My main prediction, that England would win, went out the window when Sven couldn’t make up his mind and when Rooney lost his mind. (Trust a Man Utd player to deliberately sabotage my predictions). The main reason I think England lost was they were too pampered – more on this later – if I can be bothered that is!

I lost that one.

However I did predict a few things that have come to pass

1. A team from Europe would win the World Cup in Europe – looks obvious now doesn’t it?
2. Brazil would get knocked out in the quarter finals by a European team – looks obvious now doesn’t it. (NIKE does not choose the World Champions Milo, MsK,stpdblessd, Mama Mia et al!)
3. The Netherlands and Spain would choke – looks obvious now doesn’t it?
4. Argentina had as much chance of winning this world as I do in making a rap music video swimming with dolphins.
5. The “old men” of France would rise again – although even I didn’t think they would go this far.

Observations from England:

In football terms England is two countries. The south and the north. If you offered football fans who support teams in the north a choice of either:

a.) England win the World Cup or
b.) Your team wins the League + FA cup double next season

99% of football fans in the north would choose the second option, club over country, every time. (This also explains the completely negative attitude many football fans have over the African Cup of Nations – not because they are neo colonialists etc but because in their eyes there is nothing above their football club, not even the English national team, and thus can not even begin to understand why anyone would want to go and play in a tournament in the middle of their club season.) Football fans in the north do not expect any respect from the FA for their team and their players. (Liverpool and ManUtd are such giants there is no way the FA could ignore them. But in a country where cricket players are given OBEs and MBEs for winning ONE series not a single Liverpool player was honoured for the remarkable run to the European Cup!)
Case in point:Bolton FC fans were livid that not a single battle harden Bolton player made Sven’s final 23, yet untried youngsters who play for London teams were chosen.

This also explains the whole reaction to Rooney v Ronaldo. While national tabloid newspapers are busy slaughtering Ronaldo saying how he will never be allowed to set foot in England again, ManUtd fans have been here again and again and can not be bothered. when Cantona went nuts, he was public enemy number 1 but came back with a break through season and ManUtd fans loved him, when Beckham was public enemy number 1 (after France ’98) he came back with a break through season and ManUtd fans loved him, same with Keane and the same will happen with Ronaldo (well expect for the fact that some ManUtd fans have been carrying some serious hate for Ronaldo for the past 1.5 seasons.)

Aii I have mentioned Man Utd many times in this post. Let me look for some Harpic to disinfect my blog.

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